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Tuesday, 9 August 2011

Change of Outlook

As you've probably noticed, I've changed my blog.  Again.  (If you haven't noticed then I appreciate that you are drawn straight to my words but really, not noticing is not a good sign or appreciating life in general.) 

After writing yesterday's post, I really wanted to change my blog design to reflect me as last time I simply settled for a design that was alright, but not quite right.  Turns out there was a reason I settled.  Finding the right background, something that truly reflects me, is bloody difficult.  No, seriously, it took me over two hours to find this background (which, by the way, I found here).

The problem was, I didn't really know what I wanted it to reflect.  Sure, I enjoy crafts so that was the first thing I looked for.  But just because I enjoy it doesn't mean it can reflect me.  There was also an awesome food/cooking background but as this is blog is not about cooking it didn't feel right - in the same way that this blog isn't about crafts.  There may be elements of crafts and cooking in this blog, but that's not what it's about.  It's about me.  And I am not crafts or cooking.  I'm not entirely sure who I am/what I want which turned out to be the problem.

In the end I went for something that made me feel how I want to come across.  Yes, it is a ploy for you to see me in a certain light, but that is true of everything we do online.  This background, to me, suggests serenity and beauty, something natural yet made by humans.  And I guess that's who I want to be.  I want to be serene in my outlook.  I want my words to be beautiful.  I want to show that I am part of nature, and yet a product of others (society, upbringing, etc).  I don't know if this is what I am.  It's just what I want to project.  Therefore, it made sense to me to use my blog as a place to show this and hope that in projecting it, I will become it (after all, I'm a true believer that if you wear a mask, sooner or later it stops being a mask).

I am curious though as to how you, my reader, see me.  Are you nodding your head in agreement with the above paragraph?  Or do you think I'm wrong about myself?  Seriously, I want to know.

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