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Monday, 30 June 2014

Harriet the Spy: Blog Wars

I have just watched Harriet the Spy: Blog Wars. Of course, I am biased in loving the film starring Michelle Trachtenberg (1996 version), but have to admit that anything about Harriet Welsch always gets me in the mood for writing.  When I was younger I even had an A4 notebook marked 'Private' and went out to 'spy' on my neighbours, though I was never as impressive in my tactics as Michelle Tractenberg's Harriet, but she was my inspiration.

Harriet the Spy: Blog Wars includes many of the same characters (though I was deeply unimpressed with 'Golly') with similar attributes, but that's pretty much where the similarities of the films end.  Blog Wars is clearly an attempt to modernize a story that honestly doesn't need it; although in retrospect I will admit that many of the moments of the 1996 stretched the credibility (but I also have to admit that these moments were a large part of the attraction to the film).  I have to say that I went into the film quite cynical, and other than the character of Harriet Welsch I think I'll stand by that.  I was pleasantly surprised to enjoy Jennifer Stone's Harriet and found her to be an irritating teenage girl that struggles with the same problems in life as all other teenage girls.  In Blog Wars she is vying to write the class blog (as opposed to the newspaper) and when her first few posts aren't well-received she decides to 'stretch the truth' by writing about a famous actor whom she claims to know personally (when in actuality he is working with her father).  I have to say I was disappointed with the climax as it wasn't nearly as intense as the 1996 film, and honestly, it implies at the end that Harriet didn't learn her lesson.

Okay, so I wasn't planning on writing a mini-review, or even a comparison between the two films (as I said, I simply get inspired to write by Harriet Welsch), but apparently that's what you're getting today.

Thursday, 26 June 2014

Ricocheting Emotions

Over the past few months I have become increasingly aware of my ricocheting emotions.  While my anti-depressants help me not want to burst into tears every few hours, it seems that all my other emotions only know the intense setting, and the worst thing is that most of the time they are set off by something completely mundane.  It makes it so much harder when I know I'm being unreasonably upset, angry or enthusiastic, especially if I am around others (as the last thing I want to do is take it out on the few people I actually get to see in real life).  The real challenge, though, is that I want to feel.

In the past I have experienced complete numbness, and when I started feeling again I vowed I'd always do my best to never go numb again.  But I'm beginning to wonder if the state I'm currently in - flicking between extremes of emotions that can change without any warning - is just as bad. I have gone from one extreme to the other, and as it's something that affects how I look after myself (if I'm upset all I want to do is eat crap for example), I think it's time I tried to find a middle ground. The only problem is that I have no idea where to start.

If you also suffer from hormonal-type emotion extremes I'd really appreciate any ideas on how you keep it together.  For me, the most important things are warning those I'm with if I suddenly feel upset or angry; and focusing on the fact that each emotion will pass, and while they are important, they are not the whole picture.

Wednesday, 25 June 2014

The Importance of Each Photo

Over the past few days I have spent a lot of time editing hundreds of pictures (taken over the past 7 months) that were sitting on my laptop or locked into my camera.  As I have gone through them, I noticed how I'm finally at a point where I feel comfortable deleting a lot of the photos; I am still learning to be completely ruthless but I'm definitely getting there.

In the past photos were only taken of special occasions, and while I love taking pictures of life, I think the importance of a physical memory that our descendants can look at, is easily forgotten. I am grateful to live in a time where photo-taking is as simple as a press of a button (though, it has to be remembered, can also be deleted at a press of a button as I discovered during my trip to Paris at school) and I wish there were more photos of me when I was younger.

I love taking photos, and I love having a lot of photos documenting my life (though unfortunately, being behind the camera means I'm not actually in many).  However, I feel that with digital cameras it's now so easy to take photos and that's it, most of them will sit on a camera, phone or computer until they are lost. It has become so easy that we forget how important a photo can be.  It is easy to acquire thousands of photos that will never see the light of day - either because they aren't any good, or simply because there are many that capture the same moment, a few seconds apart.  It is this latter category I have difficulty with deleting, but I figure that I'm only going to want one version of that moment to be printed out for my albums.

So I'm learning to give the important photos the respect they deserve by deleting the rest. With so many pictures, it is easy for the great ones to be lost among the many; it is with this thought that I will continue editing and deleting my photos, ensuring to have no photos I'm not one hundred percent happy with (okay, ninety-eight percent as a hundred percent is probably a little too much to be asking of someone who knows nothing about photography).

Do you keep all the photos you take? Do you get them printed out?

Thursday, 12 June 2014

Stepping Through the Past

It feels like forever since I last posted (though in reality it's only a couple of weeks). For the past week especially I have been trying to figure out what to write about, what to say. And the longer I didn't post, the harder it was to think of something worthy of breaking the (unintentional) silence. It feels as though I should update you on what has been happening in my life, and at the same time make sure to impart something meaningful and insightful - all while not boring you.

Then I realised that it shouldn't matter what I write, as long as I write something. So that's what this post is, something. It's not deep or explanatory, or remotely interesting, but at least it's better than not posting anything.  So this is the post that will hopefully let me take another step forward with this blog, as I refuse to let it die after so many hours (more like days and weeks) I have put into this space.

Needless to say I don't know where I'm going. I know I've said it before, and I'm sure I'll say it again. That's just what life is though, not always knowing or even having a plan, but trusting in ourselves to take a step now and then in the direction that will become our past.

This post ended somewhere I wasn't expecting, but these words feel right for where I am at right now. I need to believe it doesn't matter that I don't know what's in store for me. Rather, I am excited to find out where my path will lead.

And with that note, I think it's time to stop worrying so much about what I do and don't write about, and just post this as another step in my past.