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Wednesday 24 September 2014 the Sofa

For the past year or so I have done everything in/on my bed. It has become my place to sleep, eat, watch Netflix, go online, read, stitch, etc (you get the idea). This week I have finally moved over to the sofa. It’s less than three steps away (or it would be if that side of the bed was tidy!) so isn’t far. But to me the sofa is a whole new world to explore. The main reason I wanted to move away from living in my bed is to try and recondition my mind to know that the bed is for sleeping and resting only (okay, and acts of nakedness); I’m also hoping it will help with some of the back ache I get from slouching on a bed all day.

 So far it seems to be working, though it still feels unnatural to sit on the sofa ; it’s still a decision I have to make every morning.  But I have noticed I am already a lot more motivated, especially in sorting out the flat (progress is slow, but at least it’s being made). The only real issue is the window is now directly behind me so at certain times of day I have to shut out the natural light if I wish to see the screen of my laptop; and I haven’t quite worked out the most comfortable position even with all the cushions I have to help me.

Moving from the bed to the sofa might seem like a tiny insignificant step, but for me it is a step towards the life I want to be leading. They say the only way to create change is to do something different, and so here I am, sitting on the sofa.

Thursday 11 September 2014

Angry and Frustrated

The other day I noticed I haven't been  my usual, happy self recently. To be honest, especially around strangers I've been rude and crotchety.  Of course, this isn't how I want to be, as I've always made it a priority to smile and be pleasant as doing so can have incredible (and wonderful) effects on others, and even if not, you know you've done your best to improve their day.

The problem is, even though I've become aware of it, I still feel a churning anger and frustration inside me. As it's so big, it has become hard not to just react in that way whenever someone irritates me (and to be honest, at the minute, most people irritate me).  I'm hoping it's just hormones and it will go away soon, as this is not the person i want to be.

Until then I'm going to try and tame my temper and smile at everyone no matter what. Do you have any tricks to keep yourself pleasant when you really don't want to be?