Blogmas or Blogvent?

Hi all,

I can't believe it is December already.  And I can't believe just how many months have gone by without me blogging (I'm not even going to count as it just makes me sad).  The truth is I love blogging and always knew I would come back, though I'll admit that I did consider not coming back to this blog (I even wrote the farewell post but then changed my mind).

Anyway, as I have been struggling to get back into blogging (and everything else in my life) with all the changes that have happened to me over the past 6 months, I have decided that I am going to blog every day this December which will force me to get on and write something (or at least post something!).  Last year I watched a few 'Blogmas' videos which are basically the same idea but in vlog form, and I will be watching quite a few this year as well, but I don't know whether to follow suit and call this Blogmas or Blogvent - please let me know which you prefer.  Perhaps this can become an annual thing as I love Christmas and December and New Year's so am looking forward to what this month will bring.  Not every post will be about the holidays but I will warn you that if you aren't a Christmas-obsessed person then you might want to steer clear from this blog for the next month!

Guess I should now start thinking of some things that I can write about and let me know if you plan on joining in so I can read your blogs as well.

Love. Hope. Joy. Peace

These are the words that have been knocking about my brain for the past few days.  And I am beginning to realise that these might possibly be the most important words in the English language (alongside Trust).

Love.  Hope.  Joy.  Peace.

When I shift my focus to soaking in these words and allowing their abundance to be felt deep inside of me, I become more than me I am a golden shimmering version of me – the me I am supposed to be.

Love.  Hope.  Joy.  Peace.

When I entrench every part of my life in these words, life becomes more magical than I could ever have imagined.  It is still hard and painful and difficult.  But it is also easy and safe and beautiful.  I am lifted out of the everyday monotony of dealing with my disability and exist as I was meant to, my essence shining through.

Love.  Hope.  Joy.  Peace.

And I know that my future will be amazing.  And that I will achieve what I am meant to achieve.  And that I can share these beautiful feelings with the world.  There will never be a shortage of them and so I want to let them flow out of me and into every person I meet, every person whose words I read, every person who I know needs to feel them, every person in the universe.

I have Love, Hope, Joy and Peace.

I feel Love, Hope, Joy and Peace.

I give Love, Hope, Joy and Peace.

I am Love, Hope, Joy and Peace.

My Week In Pictures

I still don't have the words to write, despite feeling like I want to start writing again, but I do have the pictures.

 1.Green Smoothie 2. Banana and coconut ice pops 3-6. Local carnival 7. Noah's arc cross-stitch I'm working on for SOLAK 8. The Olympic Torch (at 6.30am this morning!)

Blogging in my Future

Not a day goes past without me thinking about blogging.  I have been blogging now for a few years and I still love it - in fact, I would say I love it more now than I ever have before.

So why haven't I been posting recently?  Because I don't have the words.  Or the pictures. 

Everyday I think about writing here and almost everyday I struggle to find anything I want to say.  Right now in my life I am in a very introspective place.  I am spending time with my crafts and my thoughts and my feelings.  I am allowing silence to fill me so I may know the direction I am going and if it's where I want to be.  I want to share all of this here, but I feel that sharing too soon will cause a rift.  And so I sit alone, behind my screen, in front of a book, with a pen and paper.  I sit and try to be.  I sit and try to find out anything about myself that can help me.

I want to let you know that I am not abandoning my blogging or projects or ideas.  But I am at living in a state that needs to not have every detail and thought shared with the world.  I don't know when I will be ready to share, if ever.  But I do know that blogging will be a part of my future, as much as it is a part of my present.  Basically - I will return!  I know it can be frustrating for bloggers to post erratically, but that is what I need to do right now.  If you find it difficult to cope with knowing that posts may be a bit here, there and everywhere from me for a while, go and find someone you can depend on to follow.  If not, I hope you will enjoy the odd post that makes it to your screen from me.

Captivated By Books

As you all know, I love to read and so I was very excited when my friend Michelle invited me to be a part of her book blog, Captivated By Books.  I have just posted my first review and from now on will be posting all book reviews there.  I hope you will take a moment to take a peek, leave a comment and possibly subscribe.

Crafting My Way Back To Life

I have missed blogging so much over the past few weeks – believe me, it was completely unintentional to disappear on you for so long.   To begin with I was posting a lot less as I was focusing on moving forward with my ideas and plans.  And then life took a sudden turn and, while not unexpected, it still threw me completely.  Since then I have not felt ready to post (I am still not ready to share all the details with you but the big event was Chris and I breaking up) as I have been struggling just to manage getting through each day.

A fairy door I made for a swap

And then, a couple of days ago, I started to feel more like my old self again.  I spent some time doing some crafts for swaps on swap-bot and remembered just how much I love to create.  They were completely different from anything I’ve ever done before (and included making mail art which I am now in love with) which has made me want to explore my creativity once again.  

Cupcake mail art - front

Cupcake mail art - back

Since then I’ve started reading crafting blogs once again to inspire myself.  I feel ready for a whole new level of creativity now.  Before, I tended to stick to what I knew, I followed step-by-step instructions and I played it safe.  But now I want to explore my creativity, try new things and work on creating my own ideas.  In some areas I am still following step-by-step as I navigate my way through new terrains such as using my sewing machine, just to get myself started with the basics before trying my own thing.

The no-sew doll I made for a swap (tutorial here)

It feels as though I am quite literally crafting my way back to life, as opposed to the existing I have been doing.  The next thing I want to try is altered/decorated matchboxes (if you would like to join me I’ve created a beginner’s swap) as the pictures I have seen of them look truly amazing.

Winner Take 2

As the winner for Tangled Tides never came forward, I used Random.org to redraw and so the winner is Heather Robbins.  Please can you send an email to me at anyawillowfan(at)yahoo(dot)co(dot)uk so I can send your email to Rhemelda Publishing!