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Monday, 14 February 2011

My Love Affair

As it is supposedly the most romantic day of the year I figured I'd do a post about love.  But unlike most who are spurting off their love for the partner/friends/family (not saying I don't love you all) I wanted to do something different.  Something just as important to me.

I want to tell you about my love affair with words.

I don't know when exactly it started.  When I was younger I was surrounded by books and books and more books.  We didn't have a television, and I think, when I was very little, we didn't have a computer.  So the choices to keep ourselves occupied were quite thin - or so you'd think.  We could play with each other (bonus of a big family), we could play board games, but most of the time I chose to read.  All I can really remember of my childhood is books.  I devoured them, spending hours in my room, trying to absorb every story I could get my hands on.  I am only now beginning to come to terms with the fact that I can't possibly read everything out there (though that won't stop me doing my damn best to).

I bet you're all thinking, of course she loves to read, of course she loves books, she's a writer.  And that is true.  But the love of words and books came long before the writing.  When I was younger I wanted to be a writer, that much is true.  But I honestly don't ever remember writing anything other than my diary.  My diary was the only place I actually used words.  It didn't occur to me that to be a writer I'd actually have to write.  No, I think what led me to wanting to write was my love of reading.  I wanted to be a part of every world I read about, and my only logical conclusion was that I'd have to write books to join in.  I still haven't written a novel, though I am much closer now to be a writer than I ever was.

The thing is, I've tried other things.  For a while I thought I was into politics - needless to say that didn't last long.  I think I've been into various crafts on and off over the years.  And there was even two years that I spent in acting class.  But after every fad I'd return to my diaries, to my books.  That was the only place I was truly safe.  So that's why I know I might not become a published writer, but I will always be a reader.

So today, on the day of love, I'm declaring my love of words.  The way they can make you feel safe, scared, loved, grossed out.  But never lonely.  Because, from what I can tell of limited knowledge of love, love is about not being lonely, about having someone to share with.  I hope I'll always have real love and people to share with, but I know for a fact that I'll always have words to keep me company.  I couldn't live without words, they are what has kept me going for my whole life, and that is why I'm determined to use them to touch others.  That is, after all, what words do best.  I know they can harm and hurt just as easily, but I respect words and so hope to never use them for evil.  I hope you feel the same.

What is your relationship with words?  Have you always been a reader or do you simply use them to talk to your friends, without a second thought?

[all images from WeHeartIt]

1 comment:

Kess said...

What a brilliant post Bethany! Again, one I can so relate to, and a reminder of how alike we are!