Today in his One Thing Today podcast, Michael Nobbs talked about trusting ourselves and how that trust can be lost when we commit to things but then are unable to do them due to our limited energy and end up backing out at the last moment. This struck particularly hard with me as I am aware of the number of times I have said ‘I’m going to do this’ (especially on this blog) and share my plans, only to never have them come to fruition simply because I’m physically unable to actually complete them. I feel that I have not only lost the trust of my friends, family and readers, but I’ve lost trust in myself.
Over the past year I’ve found this very difficult to cope with as I want to be a reliable person, but often my M.E. prevents this from happening. Michael suggests that the best way to deal with it is to not commit to anything you aren’t very sure you can finish, and in the way rebuild the trust in yourself. I have tried this but found that I end up not doing anything because I haven’t committed to doing it and therefore don’t have the motivation to do it (my self-discipline is a work in progress).
For me I feel the solution is somewhere in between but it’s a delicate balance I have yet to find. At the same time I know I am making progress. As I said, for a long time I just didn’t commit to anything, but a couple of weeks ago I committed to my ‘Memories That Have Made Me’ Friday posts. While I feel I did wait longer to introduce them than perhaps I should have, knowing that I am being reliable and posting them every week has had a huge effect on me. I’m still not ready to share a lot of the plans I have for fear of what will happen to my self-confidence if I fail, but it feels as though I have taken a step in the right direction.
How do you cope with commitments? Do you over commit to more than you can manage? Do you under commit? Or have you found that magic balance that works for you? Let me know in the comments.